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marriage & relationships

A SMILE THAT CAN LAUNCH A THOUSAND SHIPS


JANUARY 2013
by Lisa Maki

Picture
A simple, sincere, heartfelt smile is all you need to launch a thousand ships in your marriage.  These ships may be relationships, breakthroughs and opportunities, voyages and missions, healing and deliverance, or any powerful move of God. 

Nehemiah 8:10 says that the joy of the Lord is your strength.  And you can’t have joy without a smile.  In fact, smile is the physical manifestation of a spirit of joy bubbling inside of you.  This smile is your source of power.

Though it’s hard to fake a smile, practicing to smile can turn into a habit, and eventually a lifestyle.  Try to smile when you are feeling down.  It will be difficult at the start but the more you do it, the less down you will feel, and ultimately joy will start rising from within you. 

Having that smile on your face draws your husband closer to you.  It makes him feel light and peaceful.  It makes him want to be around you all the time.  You become a breath of fresh air for him.  My smile melts my husband’s heart and makes him want to come home to me with excited anticipation, knowing that he can relax and be at peace.

I am sharing all these with you not because I have been an expert on this matter but because I have come to realize how true it is.  Though I have always been a pleasant person, the stress and problems of everyday life weigh me down most of the time.  Marriage brought with it its own sets of challenges too that robbed me off my joy at certain points in the early years of my marriage.

I know a lot of you can relate to this one.  Your husband got attracted to you because of your smile.  He felt wanted and desired.  He felt comfortable with you.  Then problems came and you started losing that smile.  He comes to you and says that you have changed.  He doesn’t even want to be around you anymore.  You blame him for it, but honestly, you agree with him.

The fact remains that God created us women as encouragers.  You can’t be encouraging without a smile.  Actually, you don’t even have to say anything sometimes.  A simple smile can be the most encouraging gesture to your man or any other person for that matter.

Men are drawn to a smiling face.  The devil knows this too well which is why porn sites are filled with young girls with those innocent smiles.  If a husband comes home to a wife who always looks miserable, he will be easily enticed by other women who will offer him that smile.  Of course you can say, “How dare he do something like that when he is the one causing my misery”.   And I can totally feel you on this one.  However, this will not make you win him back, unless you really want him out of your life. 

Let me share with you a secret on how I can remain smiling despite some hurtful or angry feelings I have inside of me.  It’s not easy though and some days I am better, while some days I am not. 

I try to contain my hurts and anger within myself and leave it between me and God.  I cry to God privately and ask Him to sustain me.  I also ask Him to isolate me and not let my husband sense what I am going through.  When I leave my hurts between me and God, and when I subject all my feelings to Him, He comes quickly on my behalf.  God surely rewards our efforts.  He knows that I want to keep that smile on my face to please Him, and so He helps me with it all the time.

Proverbs 31 describes a virtuous woman/wife as “smiling at the future”, which means she is not worried.  Worry can surely erase that smile on your face and I’m telling you ... this is one of the biggest turn-offs for men.  You can ask them and find it out for yourself.

I remember an incident during the 1st year of our marriage when I was having my pity party.  My husband told me that I reminded him of his ex-girlfriend who used her pity parties to make him stay but which actually pushed him away further.

Another incident that was very similar to this was a TV show we were watching one night.  The husband had an incident in his office.  A young girl they just hired was so happy for her new job that she put her arms around him and kissed him on the lips.  This bothered the husband.  He felt good about it but knew that it was not right.  He then talked to the girl and honestly told her that what happened should never happen again.  This husband didn’t want to hide anything from his wife so he opened up to her and told her what happened.  The wife, already feeling insecure because she is an at-home mom, felt so jealous and mad.  She ended up crying and telling him how disgusted she was.  I was totally feeling her on that one and my husband blurted out:  “I hate that look”.  It made me upset that he said that.  I defended the wife and explained to him what she was going through.  My husband didn’t change his mind about her.

This is the reality, ladies.  Men hate a depressed, defeated look.  It’s not that they don’t want to see us crying.  They just don’t want to see us look so miserable.  It drives them away.  And this is why we have Jesus.  He is the One we should run to ... the One we should cry to ... the One who will let us cry without driving Him away. 

Remember ... A merry heart does good, like medicine, but a broken spirit dries the bones (Proverbs 17:22).

Your smile will heal your husband from any issues that he still has, while your misery will just dry up his bones.  Your smile will make him feel wanted, desired, and adored.  It will make him feel like a real man.  And when a man starts feeling this way, oh believe me; he will do anything for his woman.  This is where you will see him change. 

You can’t do this on your own though.  You need the joy of the Lord in you to be able to maintain that beautiful smile that God has gifted you with.  It all starts by having that desire to please your husband, as unto the Lord.



Lisa Maki is the founder, publisher, and editor of God'z Gurlz.  More about Lisa at ...

http://www.godzgurlz.com/regular-contributors.html


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