GOD'Z GURLZ <br />Bible-based webmag for women
  • Home
    • About Us >
      • Time for a Change
      • More about Lisa Maki
      • I Love You
      • Core Values
    • Marriage & Relationships >
      • THE WIFE: THE ARMOUR-BEARER >
        • THE ARMOUR-BEARER WIFE: Her Biggest Stronghold
        • THE ARMOUR-BEARER WIFE: REBUILDING THE WALL
        • The Armour-Bearer Wife: The King-Maker
      • How Long Should I Fight For My Marriage
      • Marriage: A Breeding Place For Miracles
      • MISTRESS TO BRIDE
      • Sex Before Marriage
      • AVOIDING FORNICATION
      • TEN MISTAKES SINGLE WOMEN OF GOD MAKE
      • Divorce and Remarriage
      • Respect and Guard the Marriage, Please
      • Do Not Sweat The Small Stuff In Marriage
      • Becoming One
      • My Marriage was God's Perfect Will
      • If Only
      • Don't Cross The Line
      • To Guard or Not To Guard
      • Soul Mates - Sole Mates
      • Being Married To A Visionary
      • One Team
      • Long-Distance Love: Not for the Faint of Heart
      • Your Husband Is Cheating On You
      • Single Mom's Journey
      • Understanding A Woman's Insecurities
      • God's Bigger Plan For Your Marriage
      • How To Deal With A Controlling Husband
      • Laying Down Your Life For Your Spouse
      • The Leader Wife
      • What I've Learned From My Husband
      • Daddy Issues
      • Cheat-Proof Your Marriage
      • Don't Reverse The Roles
      • Fighting For Purity
      • I Have The Best Husband
      • Dealing With Your Husband's Past
      • Wives ... ATTENTION!
      • Dealing With An Angry Husband
      • Get Down On Your Knees
      • God Hates Divorce!
      • How My Wife's Submission Changed Me
      • A Smile That Can Launch A Thousand Ships
      • Match-Maker
      • Single Mom Gets Married
      • Newly Married? The First Critical Years
      • Warrior Bride
      • Women Are Wiser
      • Pursue Me!
      • Worldly Friendships Vs. Godly Friendships
      • Bite Your Tongue
      • Spiritual Than Thou
      • My Career As A Help-Meet
      • A Good Help-Meet Is Good In Bed
      • Are You Sure You're Ready For Marriage
      • Beware Of Waiting For Your Promised Man
      • Talking To Kids About Sex
      • Embracing Your Call As A Help-Meet
      • Equal Rights?
      • I Feel So Distant
      • God Knows Who You Need
      • How Do I Know If He/She Is The Right One For Me?
      • Soul Mate - Sole Mate
      • It's Not About You
      • With All Due Respect
      • I Told You So
      • Marriage Is A Healing Ground
      • You'll Never Know What Marriage Is Until You Get There
      • Divide and Conquer
      • Father-Daughter Connection
    • Heart to Heart >
      • Are you a Queen?
      • Overcoming Depression
      • One Blow After The Next
      • Why Worry?
      • When Your Heart Gets Numb
      • Hurt Gone Deep
      • Let It Hurt!
      • I Chose Jesus, But Why Am I Hurting?
      • Onion Skin
      • Test Of Patience
      • Battle of the Minds
      • You Need Time To Heal
      • Waking Up From A Bad Dream
      • Voices From The Past
      • Don't Let Anyone Steal That Joy
      • Beat That Bad Day
      • Cross-Over
      • A Demon Called Doubt
      • Are You Sure You Are Ready To Change?
      • Learning To Trust Again
    • Inspirational >
      • Coming to Terms
      • I Repent!
      • The Unexpected Storm
      • God is a God of Process
      • Above all ... LOVE
      • When God Takes You Out Of Your Comfort Zone
      • I Don't Understand
      • You Don't Have A Clue
      • Where The Paths Meet
      • Did You Pass The Test?
      • Let Go Of That Crutch!
      • There's Something About Mary
      • Honing The Gift Of Discernment
      • God Is More Stubborn Than You
    • Teens >
      • Stop Looking At Me
      • Why Young Girls Fall For Older Men
      • I Wanna Be Cool
      • Teen Sex
      • Do You See Me?
      • I Hate My Mom/Dad
      • Enjoy Your Youth
      • My Boyfriend Is Cheating On Me
      • Teen Mom
      • Nobody Understands Me
      • The Kind Of Guy Who Deserves You
      • The Day I Ran Away From Home
      • Teen Prostitute Receives Jesus
      • Bad Girl vs. Good Girl
      • Why Do I Love Too Much?
      • The Day I Lost My Virginity
      • Hurt-Proof Your Heart
    • Business & Leadership >
      • Communicate More Effectively
      • Successful Negotiations
      • Managing Time Wisely
      • Mistakes Creative Writers Make
      • Communicating Your Vision
      • Guard Your Vision
      • Test Of Leadership
      • Starting A Business
      • Unemployed?
      • Promote Your Business Effectively
      • Work From Home
      • People Are Watching You
      • A Resume That Will Get You That Job
      • Organize Your Thoughts
    • Expose' >
      • Christian Anti-Semitism
      • The Awakening of a Catholic
      • Diary Of A Mistress
      • That Evil Spirit Named "CONTROL"
      • Losing God's Anointing
      • False Assumptions
      • Acceptance or Compromise
      • Burnt Out!
      • Teen Scandal
      • Warning To Married Couples
      • HIV and Condoms
      • Death Of Innocent Children
    • Testify! >
      • ADDICTED TO PORN
      • He Visited Me
      • He Delivered Me
    • Poetry >
      • Mystery
      • Hurts
      • You Can Do It!
    • Delicioso! >
      • Baked Rotini Pasta with Meat Sauce
      • Chicken Fettuccini
    • Meet the Lover of Our Souls
    • Teen Corner
    • Torah Teaching >
      • For Wives >
        • The First Marriage
        • Princess Sarah
        • She Knew
        • Love At First Sight
        • She Saved His Life
      • The Feasts >
        • Keep The SABBATH DAY Holy
        • The Feasts of the Lord
        • Let's Celebrate Passover
        • Rosh Hashana
        • Days of Awe
        • Yom Kippur
      • Testimony >
        • Love Is Lovelier ... The Second Time Around
        • How I Got Into The Messianic Movement
        • My Jewish Jesus
      • Jewish Feasts >
        • Do Not Flatter Yourself
        • Why I Am Celebrating Hanukkah and not Christmas
      • Others >
        • Getting To Know YESHUA
        • Bringing Out, Bringing In
        • Blinded By Despair
        • How God Deals With Those He Truly Trusts
        • Taking Over What Is Yours
        • How God Promises
        • Are We Ready For Our Promised Land?
  • New Articles
    • ME TOO
    • BREAKING CHAINS
    • ANXIETY IS REAL
    • The CHAMELEON spirit
    • Pour Your Water Onto Me
    • When Being Unproductive
    • You Can't Fix Him
    • I Can't Hear
    • I Was Raped!
    • How Well Do You Know Your Purpose?
    • My Secret Garden
    • The Flow of His Presence
    • Love Covers a Multitude of Sins
  • PROPHETIC
    • THE YEAR 2019
    • MARCHING IN
    • THE COMING KINGDOM
    • Flowing in His Circle
    • The Whirlwind
    • Too Long in the Wilderness
  • DEVOTIONAL
  • Warrior Prayer
    • Salvation Prayer
    • Submission Prayer
    • Daily Prayer
    • Rules of Engagement Prayer
    • Entering Warfare Prayer
  • SUPPORT US
  • Online Counseling
  • Archives
    • July 2012
    • August 2012
    • September 2012
    • October 2012
    • November 2012
    • December 2012
    • January 2013
    • Previous Articles >
      • The Best Christmas Gift Not In A Box
      • Is Santa God?
      • Why Are You Celebrating Christmas?
    • February 2013
    • March 2013 >
      • video
  • Contact Information

marriage & relationships

DEALING WITH AN ANGRY HUSBAND


JANUARY 2013
by Lisa Maki

Picture
It’s funny how men think that we women are the emotional beings just because we cry, get hurt, and get easily offended.  What most of them don’t realize is that their anger is also an emotion.  While women cry and they are emotional for it, men get angry and they are also emotional for it.  Some men can handle their anger issues better while others are easily angered.  Most passionate men of God are also passionate in their anger. 

If you’re married to a man who has anger issues, this article is for you.  If your husband doesn’t have anger issues, this will still help you deal with other issues he may have.  In fact, men who have anger issues have a better way of resolving their deep-seated problems.  Since anger is an indicator of something deeper, the anger in itself exposes the problem. 

According to Debi Pearl in her book, Created To Be His Help Meet, there are two kinds of anger: the anger that is just a reaction to something over some frustrations, and the anger that is rooted in bitterness.  Each type of anger needs to be dealt with in different ways. 

Just as it is very natural for us to get hurt over little things that our husbands may find very petty, it is also very natural for them to get angry over things that won’t even affect us.  They can flare up over not finding their keys, and may even blame you for it.  Or you may be talking to him about something and you caught him at the wrong time and gets mad at you for it. 

I used to be very sensitive about this.  I still am, sometimes, but I’ve improved a lot.  I’ve come to realize that when my husband is angry over something it doesn’t mean that he is mad at me.  I am learning more and more each time not to take things personally.  One thing I have discovered though is that the enemy uses our husbands’ anger to make us feel resentful of them, thus dividing us so he, the devil, can conquer.  When I see things from the spiritual realm, then I get stronger in overcoming the attack of the enemy. 

So the next time your husband gets mad over something you may think is petty, take it with a grain of salt.  It’s not about you.

The other type of anger though is deeper and should be dealt with in a more sensitive way.  This type of anger blames everybody for his demise.  It also expresses anger, hurt, and hatred towards certain groups of people, if not everybody else.  If you have a husband who has this problem, the best way for you to deal with it is to let him express himself without you telling him that he is wrong.  Then when his anger has subsided, you can gently point him to the truth.  You have to take it very easy though as you may trigger some issues within him that will bring back his anger again.  You have to be very careful too about fanning the flames of his anger.  You may agree with him over his anger towards a family member that you don’t like as well, which will just make matters worse for him.

Present to him a bigger picture of things such as where the other person is coming from.  Never do this though at the height of his anger.  For instance, if he is mad at his brother, perhaps you can discuss with him the pressures that his brother is going through and what he probably feels towards him, your husband.  Always point him back to Jesus ... what Jesus said ... what Jesus did.  Encourage him by telling him that his anger is God’s way of exposing some things to him about himself and people.  Let him know that it is alright to feel hurt (which they express through anger) because it gives way to healing.

If you are dealing with an angry husband, better learn how not to talk negatively against anyone.  If you do, it will just stir him up and will hate the people that you keep talking against.  I have made this mistake several times which is why I have learned my lesson, and sharing it with you.

Guard your heart ... be gentle ... be patient ... be encouraging ... bite your tongue ... these are the things you should do when dealing with an angry husband.  Above all, continue to pray for him ... for his healing and deliverance, and also for his self-control which is the fruit of the spirit.  The more your husband draws closer to Jesus and His Word, the more he will produce the fruits of the spirit.  And you are in the best position to make this happen.  Everything that your husband sees in you becomes an example for him to follow as well.  Remember ... you are not just his wife but you are his sister in the Lord.  He is watching you and learning from you.  When he sees you praying and reading your Word (without bragging about what you’re doing or making him feel less spiritual), it stirs him up to do the same.  He may not admit it but he feels it.  When you don’t let what other people say affect you, but instead, you pray for these people, he learns from your example.  When you don’t talk evil against anyone, he learns from you too.

So you see the best way to deal with an angry man is to counter it with the opposite of anger: peace, gentleness, love, patience, and kindness.  In doing this you not only help usher your husband’s healing and deliverance but you live God’s Word to the fullest.



Lisa Maki is the founder, publisher, and editor of God'z Gurlz.  More about Lisa at ...

http://www.godzgurlz.com/regular-contributors.html


Submit
Powered by Create your own unique website with customizable templates.