GOD'S BIGGER PLAN FOR YOUR MARRIAGE
March 2013
by Lisa Maki
If we will only see the bigger plan of God in our marriage, we wouldn’t be fretting about little stuff. We wouldn’t be wasting time on petty arguments. We wouldn’t be complaining about unfairness or be fighting about equal rights. Honestly, we have a very microscopic view of marriage. We look at it as having a partner in life, a husband to provide for us, a man who can fulfill our needs, a father to help raise our children, and every other reason that is, in essence, very earthly.
In case you haven’t realized, the Bible starts and ends in marriage. It began with the marriage of Adam and Eve in Genesis 2:21-24.
And the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam; and while he slept, He took one of his ribs or a part of his side and closed up the [place with] flesh. And the rib or part of his side which the Lord God had taken from the man He built up and made into a woman, and He brought her to the man. Then Adam said, This [creature] is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of a man. Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and shall become united and cleave to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.
In case you haven’t realized, the Bible starts and ends in marriage. It began with the marriage of Adam and Eve in Genesis 2:21-24.
And the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam; and while he slept, He took one of his ribs or a part of his side and closed up the [place with] flesh. And the rib or part of his side which the Lord God had taken from the man He built up and made into a woman, and He brought her to the man. Then Adam said, This [creature] is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of a man. Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and shall become united and cleave to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.
It ended with the marriage of Jesus and His bride, the church, in Revelations 19 and 21.
Let us rejoice and shout for joy [exulting and triumphant]! Let us celebrate and ascribe to Him glory and honor, for the marriage of the Lamb [at last] has come, and His bride has prepared herself. She has been permitted to dress in fine (radiant) linen, dazzling and white—for the fine linen is (signifies, represents) the righteousness (the upright, just, and godly living, deeds, and conduct, and right standing with God) of the saints (God’s holy people).
Then [the angel] said to me, Write this down: Blessed are those who are summoned (invited, called) to the marriage supper of the Lamb. And he said to me [further], These are the true words (the genuine and exact declarations) of God (Revelations 19:7-9).
And I saw the holy city, the new Jerusalem, descending out of heaven from God, all arrayed like a bride beautified and adorned for her husband (Revelations 21:2).
Then [the angel] said to me, Write this down: Blessed are those who are summoned (invited, called) to the marriage supper of the Lamb. And he said to me [further], These are the true words (the genuine and exact declarations) of God (Revelations 19:7-9).
And I saw the holy city, the new Jerusalem, descending out of heaven from God, all arrayed like a bride beautified and adorned for her husband (Revelations 21:2).
Marriage was designed by God as an earthly replica of His relationship with His church. It is a dress rehearsal for a future wedding. It is a model for what is to come. Thus, marriage is bigger than what we think it is. It also plays a major part not only in Jesus’ second coming but in our life after this earthly life. Every married couple, for that matter, should represent Jesus and the church at all times.
Ephesians 5 makes this even clearer. Let’s look at the role of the wife in the marriage, as compared to the church’s relationship with Jesus.
22 Wives, be subject (be submissive and adapt yourselves) to your own husbands as [a service] to the Lord. 23 For the husband is head of the wife as Christ is the Head of the church, Himself the Savior of [His] body. 24 As the church is subject to Christ, so let wives also be subject in everything to their husbands.
Now let’s look at the role of the husband in relation to Jesus’ relationship with the church.
25 Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her,
26 So that He might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the Word,
27 That He might present the church to Himself in glorious splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such things [that she might be holy and faultless].
These Scriptures are loaded and are surely a very tall order from God. We wives are expected to submit to our husbands the way the church should submit to Christ. Our husbands should love us the way Christ loves His church, sanctifying us and cleansing us so that we will be presented spotless before God.
This is more than just the husband and the wife but Jesus and His church. We wives are the models as to how the church should be. Our husbands are the ones representing Jesus. How we fulfill these roles reflects not only our marriage but our relationship with Jesus Christ. And the whole world is watching.
As I’ve said, this is a tall order which entails time, attention, and a lot of effort. The sad part is most ministers spend more time with their ministries than their marriage. Most of them are actually married to their ministries.
Recently my husband turned the TV on and it was on Benny Hinn’s show. In case you are not aware, Benny Hinn’s wife divorced him a year or two ago (I am not very sure when). It came as a shock and not a shock to me at the same time. I was shocked because I was not expecting somebody like Suzanne (Benny Hinn’s wife) to file for divorce. She is a strong woman of God and an intercessor at that. Besides, Benny Hinn admitted on TV back then that there was no Biblical ground for divorce. However, I was not shocked because I somehow knew that Benny neglected his wife and family. How could he not when he was so immersed in his ministry? I used to wonder why his wife was not as visible as him. I wanted to see her on stage too, side by side her husband.
Going back to the Benny Hinn show, I was surprised to see Suzanne and Benny holding hands, and Benny’s father and mother in-law were there with them. Benny announced that they are going to get married again this month of March. Ahhhh ... what a beautiful ending. I was so happy for them. What made me happier was when Benny admitted that he neglected his wife because of his ministry. Benny’s father-in-law admitted as well that years ago he cheated on his wife with his ministry. I wonder how many more ministers are out there who are spending more time with their ministry than with their spouse. They are surely missing the essence of marriage.
Marriage is the union of the husband and wife. It is the most intimate relationship here on earth. Our relationship with God should be the same way. In fact, Jesus Himself said in John 17:3 that Eternal life is knowing God. The word “know” in this context refers to the way a husband “knows” his wife. It is an intimate relationship. This shows that the intimacy of the husband and wife is a replica of the kind of relationship that God wants to build with His church. Thus, marriage should not be taken lightly or should not take a back seat over ministry, career, or some other priorities. It is the highest form of relationship here on earth.
This is what I was saying at the beginning of this article ... that if we only know God’s bigger plan for our marriage, we will not be focusing on petty things. We will not also be so overwhelmed with our ministries. Instead, we will obey every Word of God, more so those pertaining to our role as wives. We will be looking at ourselves not only as wives to our husbands but as the representation of the church.
What I encourage you to do, my fellow wives, is to reflect on your marriage. Don’t look at what your husband is failing to do. Instead, look at how you are faring when it comes to Jesus’ instructions for the wife in relation to how the church should be. Repent before God on how you have missed this bigger picture. Finally, ask the help of the Holy Spirit to lead you further on how you can be the wife that God created you to be. I also suggest that you start researching Scriptures on the wife’s role in the marriage, meditate on these, and apply them. You can also check the other articles on marriage we have on our Marriage and Relationship section.
I pray that we can all fulfill our roles that will reflect the way God expects the church to be.
22 Wives, be subject (be submissive and adapt yourselves) to your own husbands as [a service] to the Lord. 23 For the husband is head of the wife as Christ is the Head of the church, Himself the Savior of [His] body. 24 As the church is subject to Christ, so let wives also be subject in everything to their husbands.
Now let’s look at the role of the husband in relation to Jesus’ relationship with the church.
25 Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her,
26 So that He might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the Word,
27 That He might present the church to Himself in glorious splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such things [that she might be holy and faultless].
These Scriptures are loaded and are surely a very tall order from God. We wives are expected to submit to our husbands the way the church should submit to Christ. Our husbands should love us the way Christ loves His church, sanctifying us and cleansing us so that we will be presented spotless before God.
This is more than just the husband and the wife but Jesus and His church. We wives are the models as to how the church should be. Our husbands are the ones representing Jesus. How we fulfill these roles reflects not only our marriage but our relationship with Jesus Christ. And the whole world is watching.
As I’ve said, this is a tall order which entails time, attention, and a lot of effort. The sad part is most ministers spend more time with their ministries than their marriage. Most of them are actually married to their ministries.
Recently my husband turned the TV on and it was on Benny Hinn’s show. In case you are not aware, Benny Hinn’s wife divorced him a year or two ago (I am not very sure when). It came as a shock and not a shock to me at the same time. I was shocked because I was not expecting somebody like Suzanne (Benny Hinn’s wife) to file for divorce. She is a strong woman of God and an intercessor at that. Besides, Benny Hinn admitted on TV back then that there was no Biblical ground for divorce. However, I was not shocked because I somehow knew that Benny neglected his wife and family. How could he not when he was so immersed in his ministry? I used to wonder why his wife was not as visible as him. I wanted to see her on stage too, side by side her husband.
Going back to the Benny Hinn show, I was surprised to see Suzanne and Benny holding hands, and Benny’s father and mother in-law were there with them. Benny announced that they are going to get married again this month of March. Ahhhh ... what a beautiful ending. I was so happy for them. What made me happier was when Benny admitted that he neglected his wife because of his ministry. Benny’s father-in-law admitted as well that years ago he cheated on his wife with his ministry. I wonder how many more ministers are out there who are spending more time with their ministry than with their spouse. They are surely missing the essence of marriage.
Marriage is the union of the husband and wife. It is the most intimate relationship here on earth. Our relationship with God should be the same way. In fact, Jesus Himself said in John 17:3 that Eternal life is knowing God. The word “know” in this context refers to the way a husband “knows” his wife. It is an intimate relationship. This shows that the intimacy of the husband and wife is a replica of the kind of relationship that God wants to build with His church. Thus, marriage should not be taken lightly or should not take a back seat over ministry, career, or some other priorities. It is the highest form of relationship here on earth.
This is what I was saying at the beginning of this article ... that if we only know God’s bigger plan for our marriage, we will not be focusing on petty things. We will not also be so overwhelmed with our ministries. Instead, we will obey every Word of God, more so those pertaining to our role as wives. We will be looking at ourselves not only as wives to our husbands but as the representation of the church.
What I encourage you to do, my fellow wives, is to reflect on your marriage. Don’t look at what your husband is failing to do. Instead, look at how you are faring when it comes to Jesus’ instructions for the wife in relation to how the church should be. Repent before God on how you have missed this bigger picture. Finally, ask the help of the Holy Spirit to lead you further on how you can be the wife that God created you to be. I also suggest that you start researching Scriptures on the wife’s role in the marriage, meditate on these, and apply them. You can also check the other articles on marriage we have on our Marriage and Relationship section.
I pray that we can all fulfill our roles that will reflect the way God expects the church to be.
Lisa Maki is the founder, publisher, and editor of God'z Gurlz. More about Lisa at ...
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